Saturday, October 22, 2011

Blissful Day

Yesterday I got to spend the day with my sister and my niece.  It was a really nice day.  We talked and hung out, something that we haven't done in a long time.  I got to hold Grace almost all day, minus the feedings of course.  I even got to rock her to sleep.  I was amazed just watching her for hours and how she slept.  She would just have these random moments of smiling and "talking" in her sleep.  I loved every moment of it and can't wait until it's my turn.

Although yesterday was mostly wonderful and peaceful, I did have small moments of sadness.  That was only after my sister asked me about having children.  The thoughts of what if this is never me, why can't we conceive like a normal couple, why do I have to spend over $10,000 to have a child.  I have arrived in that part of my journey where I am comfortable talking about IF, but I still have these little bouts of sadness come over me.  However it didn't last long.  My sister was great about it.  She wanted to know what was going on and everything.

I just can't wait to have another day like yesterday....minus the sadness.

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